"some of the things i write" comments and critics - Page 2

DemonGod · 03-18-2008, 07:33 PM

I don't really know I just write what comes to mind

teen4truth · 04-02-2008, 04:18 AM

I just read the first 6, nice work! Normally I hate non-rhyming poems, but I really like your stuff!

The only one I didn't like was the first because I didn't fully agree with it, but that's a whole nother conversation in itself.

I loved Attacked?, Love, and Suffering.

Attacked? was cool because it took a unique twist on a topic that tons of poems have been written on.

I like Love so much because it's the sad story of so many teens-and even adults-today. I do have to say that I didn't fully understand the end part of 'never to be heard of again.'

I liked pain because it makes a dark point that holds a lot of truth. I didn't fully agree with the 'nothing can cure it, nothing can reach it' part, but once again that's a whole nother conversation in itself.

Gosh sorry this is so long but I very rarely actually enjoy poems I read by other users on forums ^^;

I guess I like yours so much because they felt real and honest, they make a connection with a lot of us teens, and they're very clear and easy to understand-so many people seem to over use flowerdy words and phrases to make their stuff sound good or dreamy and just end up with a pile of meaningless, disconnected lines that may or may not have a sense of beauty.

Nice work, cousin! *huggles*

oh btw do you mind if I save some to my com?

DemonGod · 04-03-2008, 07:46 PM

that is officially the best comment i've ever had.

i don't want to start a debate over the first poem either.

the end of love is just what it says, she would never hear of me again.

and for pain, as far as i know a cure for the death and suffering in the world is yet to be found, but if you have another vision on that part i don't mind it, i think poems are meant to be that way.

I don't mind if you save some to your computer, i would be honoured if you would do that

Barzillal · 04-04-2008, 01:05 AM

wow teeny o.O thats a nice interpretation of Demon's poem

teen4truth · 04-04-2008, 03:58 AM

hey you spelt honored funny are you British or something? Sorry guys I guess that has nothing to do with poetry ^^;

DemonGod · 04-04-2008, 10:10 PM

how do you mean funny, this is how you spell it according to my dictionary
and no i'm not british, i'm dutch

teen4truth · 04-05-2008, 04:51 AM

mmmm yet another person to make me feel boring for being American XD

DemonGod · 04-06-2008, 01:32 PM

want to switch countries, i hate mine, it's totally anime dead...

and do you have a suggestion for a next poem, i'm kinda idea-less now

teen4truth · 04-07-2008, 01:49 PM

nah lets both just ditch our countries for Japan!

hmmm I don't know...I'll think about and if I think of anything I'll post it.

DemonGod · 04-07-2008, 08:01 PM

Go Japan! Anime on TV! Anime stores! earning money with cosplay to buy anime!

i'll wait for your answer while thinking myself

03-18-2008, 07:33 PM	#11 (permalink)
DemonGod Koi's Bunny Join Date: Dec 2007 Location: In my dreams, together with her Age: 17 Posts: 3,722 Rep Power: 1243	I don't really know I just write what comes to mind __________________ Thanks a bunch asura :D thanks sano ^^ What could be under this spoiler..? Spoiler omg! O: didn't expect that! My claimed characters ^^ Spoiler Some of the things I've written: http://www.animea.net/forums/f50/som...w-s-emo-17252/ Place comments for those things here: http://www.animea.net/forums/f51/som...critics-17253/ AnimeA's family tree (if something's wrong pm me) http://i265.photobucket.com/albums/i...m/stamboom.jpg It looks so much better now =D My personality tests (7 and probably still more to come o.o) Spoiler "You're black! Your deep and mysterious, the perfect mix!" "Blue You are calm and controlled. You are also very sweet and get along with others well. Sometimes others do not understand why you are so nice and think you have a hidden agenda. If you do...thats to bad, but if you don't you have nothing to worry about! =]" Which Final Fantasy Character Are You? twilight test: "You are Edward! You are extremely good-looking and loving with excellent taste in music. Apparently your hobbies include music, fastness, and Bella. ^.~" seems she was right about me >.> but i would replace the Bella hobby with Rachy ;) o.o vampire test: You're a vampire bat. Aww... who's the cutest-wutest vampire in the world? You are! Normal vampires tend to be cranky and mean, but you're a sweet, sensitive little thing. You don't want to live in a drafty old castle; you'd rather hang out somewhere tropical with all of your friends. When you get hungry, instead of biting big holes in someone's neck, you make two teeny holes in their finger and lap up the blood with your tongue. If you could just shake that unfortunate habit of feeding on people while they're sleeping, you'd probably be the most popular pet on the planet -- you're fuzzy, you fit in a handbag, and you fly! Other signatures by de-kun, tama-san and asura: Spoiler How to not open a door XD Spoiler My Deviant :3 http://demon-god.deviantart.com/ She's mine and mine only ^^ Spoiler My hot foxy ^^ My little minions :3 Spoiler please feed them and help them evolve ^^ Adopted from Valenth Visit the Official AnimeA IRC Channel ^^

04-02-2008, 04:18 AM	#12 (permalink)
teen4truth Bélias Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Missouri, USA Posts: 219 Rep Power: 206	I just read the first 6, nice work! Normally I hate non-rhyming poems, but I really like your stuff! The only one I didn't like was the first because I didn't fully agree with it, but that's a whole nother conversation in itself. I loved Attacked?, Love, and Suffering. Attacked? was cool because it took a unique twist on a topic that tons of poems have been written on. I like Love so much because it's the sad story of so many teens-and even adults-today. I do have to say that I didn't fully understand the end part of 'never to be heard of again.' I liked pain because it makes a dark point that holds a lot of truth. I didn't fully agree with the 'nothing can cure it, nothing can reach it' part, but once again that's a whole nother conversation in itself. Gosh sorry this is so long but I very rarely actually enjoy poems I read by other users on forums ^^; I guess I like yours so much because they felt real and honest, they make a connection with a lot of us teens, and they're very clear and easy to understand-so many people seem to over use flowerdy words and phrases to make their stuff sound good or dreamy and just end up with a pile of meaningless, disconnected lines that may or may not have a sense of beauty. Nice work, cousin! huggles oh btw do you mind if I save some to my com? __________________ I'm a Creationist because of personal spiritual experience and because of science. Want to discuss creation/evolution? Feel free to message me. A ship on a voyage could sink in the deep A ship in the shallow could crack on the reef Only ashore is it safe where it is built... But only ashore is it useless. -from Dream by GS Megaphone Last edited by teen4truth; 04-02-2008 at 04:22 AM.

04-03-2008, 07:46 PM	#13 (permalink)
DemonGod Koi's Bunny Join Date: Dec 2007 Location: In my dreams, together with her Age: 17 Posts: 3,722 Rep Power: 1243	that is officially the best comment i've ever had. i don't want to start a debate over the first poem either. the end of love is just what it says, she would never hear of me again. and for pain, as far as i know a cure for the death and suffering in the world is yet to be found, but if you have another vision on that part i don't mind it, i think poems are meant to be that way. I don't mind if you save some to your computer, i would be honoured if you would do that __________________ Thanks a bunch asura :D thanks sano ^^ What could be under this spoiler..? Spoiler omg! O: didn't expect that! My claimed characters ^^ Spoiler Some of the things I've written: http://www.animea.net/forums/f50/som...w-s-emo-17252/ Place comments for those things here: http://www.animea.net/forums/f51/som...critics-17253/ AnimeA's family tree (if something's wrong pm me) http://i265.photobucket.com/albums/i...m/stamboom.jpg It looks so much better now =D My personality tests (7 and probably still more to come o.o) Spoiler "You're black! Your deep and mysterious, the perfect mix!" "Blue You are calm and controlled. You are also very sweet and get along with others well. Sometimes others do not understand why you are so nice and think you have a hidden agenda. If you do...thats to bad, but if you don't you have nothing to worry about! =]" Which Final Fantasy Character Are You? twilight test: "You are Edward! You are extremely good-looking and loving with excellent taste in music. Apparently your hobbies include music, fastness, and Bella. ^.~" seems she was right about me >.> but i would replace the Bella hobby with Rachy ;) o.o vampire test: You're a vampire bat. Aww... who's the cutest-wutest vampire in the world? You are! Normal vampires tend to be cranky and mean, but you're a sweet, sensitive little thing. You don't want to live in a drafty old castle; you'd rather hang out somewhere tropical with all of your friends. When you get hungry, instead of biting big holes in someone's neck, you make two teeny holes in their finger and lap up the blood with your tongue. If you could just shake that unfortunate habit of feeding on people while they're sleeping, you'd probably be the most popular pet on the planet -- you're fuzzy, you fit in a handbag, and you fly! Other signatures by de-kun, tama-san and asura: Spoiler How to not open a door XD Spoiler My Deviant :3 http://demon-god.deviantart.com/ She's mine and mine only ^^ Spoiler My hot foxy ^^ My little minions :3 Spoiler please feed them and help them evolve ^^ Adopted from Valenth Visit the Official AnimeA IRC Channel ^^

04-04-2008, 01:05 AM	#14 (permalink)
Barzillal Vanguard Join Date: Jun 2007 Location: Under the stairs Posts: 7,540 Rep Power: 223	wow teeny o.O thats a nice interpretation of Demon's poem __________________ sig made by our very own de-kun I will be in and out... I have something to do ahahaha D: Christ I hate...this Fanclubs Spoiler Family Tree Spoiler

04-04-2008, 03:58 AM	#15 (permalink)
teen4truth Bélias Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Missouri, USA Posts: 219 Rep Power: 206	hey you spelt honored funny are you British or something? Sorry guys I guess that has nothing to do with poetry ^^; __________________ I'm a Creationist because of personal spiritual experience and because of science. Want to discuss creation/evolution? Feel free to message me. A ship on a voyage could sink in the deep A ship in the shallow could crack on the reef Only ashore is it safe where it is built... But only ashore is it useless. -from Dream by GS Megaphone

04-04-2008, 10:10 PM	#16 (permalink)
DemonGod Koi's Bunny Join Date: Dec 2007 Location: In my dreams, together with her Age: 17 Posts: 3,722 Rep Power: 1243	how do you mean funny, this is how you spell it according to my dictionary and no i'm not british, i'm dutch __________________ Thanks a bunch asura :D thanks sano ^^ What could be under this spoiler..? Spoiler omg! O: didn't expect that! My claimed characters ^^ Spoiler Some of the things I've written: http://www.animea.net/forums/f50/som...w-s-emo-17252/ Place comments for those things here: http://www.animea.net/forums/f51/som...critics-17253/ AnimeA's family tree (if something's wrong pm me) http://i265.photobucket.com/albums/i...m/stamboom.jpg It looks so much better now =D My personality tests (7 and probably still more to come o.o) Spoiler "You're black! Your deep and mysterious, the perfect mix!" "Blue You are calm and controlled. You are also very sweet and get along with others well. Sometimes others do not understand why you are so nice and think you have a hidden agenda. If you do...thats to bad, but if you don't you have nothing to worry about! =]" Which Final Fantasy Character Are You? twilight test: "You are Edward! You are extremely good-looking and loving with excellent taste in music. Apparently your hobbies include music, fastness, and Bella. ^.~" seems she was right about me >.> but i would replace the Bella hobby with Rachy ;) o.o vampire test: You're a vampire bat. Aww... who's the cutest-wutest vampire in the world? You are! Normal vampires tend to be cranky and mean, but you're a sweet, sensitive little thing. You don't want to live in a drafty old castle; you'd rather hang out somewhere tropical with all of your friends. When you get hungry, instead of biting big holes in someone's neck, you make two teeny holes in their finger and lap up the blood with your tongue. If you could just shake that unfortunate habit of feeding on people while they're sleeping, you'd probably be the most popular pet on the planet -- you're fuzzy, you fit in a handbag, and you fly! Other signatures by de-kun, tama-san and asura: Spoiler How to not open a door XD Spoiler My Deviant :3 http://demon-god.deviantart.com/ She's mine and mine only ^^ Spoiler My hot foxy ^^ My little minions :3 Spoiler please feed them and help them evolve ^^ Adopted from Valenth Visit the Official AnimeA IRC Channel ^^

04-05-2008, 04:51 AM	#17 (permalink)
teen4truth Bélias Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Missouri, USA Posts: 219 Rep Power: 206	mmmm yet another person to make me feel boring for being American XD __________________ I'm a Creationist because of personal spiritual experience and because of science. Want to discuss creation/evolution? Feel free to message me. A ship on a voyage could sink in the deep A ship in the shallow could crack on the reef Only ashore is it safe where it is built... But only ashore is it useless. -from Dream by GS Megaphone

04-06-2008, 01:32 PM	#18 (permalink)
DemonGod Koi's Bunny Join Date: Dec 2007 Location: In my dreams, together with her Age: 17 Posts: 3,722 Rep Power: 1243	want to switch countries, i hate mine, it's totally anime dead... and do you have a suggestion for a next poem, i'm kinda idea-less now __________________ Thanks a bunch asura :D thanks sano ^^ What could be under this spoiler..? Spoiler omg! O: didn't expect that! My claimed characters ^^ Spoiler Some of the things I've written: http://www.animea.net/forums/f50/som...w-s-emo-17252/ Place comments for those things here: http://www.animea.net/forums/f51/som...critics-17253/ AnimeA's family tree (if something's wrong pm me) http://i265.photobucket.com/albums/i...m/stamboom.jpg It looks so much better now =D My personality tests (7 and probably still more to come o.o) Spoiler "You're black! Your deep and mysterious, the perfect mix!" "Blue You are calm and controlled. You are also very sweet and get along with others well. Sometimes others do not understand why you are so nice and think you have a hidden agenda. If you do...thats to bad, but if you don't you have nothing to worry about! =]" Which Final Fantasy Character Are You? twilight test: "You are Edward! You are extremely good-looking and loving with excellent taste in music. Apparently your hobbies include music, fastness, and Bella. ^.~" seems she was right about me >.> but i would replace the Bella hobby with Rachy ;) o.o vampire test: You're a vampire bat. Aww... who's the cutest-wutest vampire in the world? You are! Normal vampires tend to be cranky and mean, but you're a sweet, sensitive little thing. You don't want to live in a drafty old castle; you'd rather hang out somewhere tropical with all of your friends. When you get hungry, instead of biting big holes in someone's neck, you make two teeny holes in their finger and lap up the blood with your tongue. If you could just shake that unfortunate habit of feeding on people while they're sleeping, you'd probably be the most popular pet on the planet -- you're fuzzy, you fit in a handbag, and you fly! Other signatures by de-kun, tama-san and asura: Spoiler How to not open a door XD Spoiler My Deviant :3 http://demon-god.deviantart.com/ She's mine and mine only ^^ Spoiler My hot foxy ^^ My little minions :3 Spoiler please feed them and help them evolve ^^ Adopted from Valenth Visit the Official AnimeA IRC Channel ^^

04-07-2008, 01:49 PM	#19 (permalink)
teen4truth Bélias Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Missouri, USA Posts: 219 Rep Power: 206	nah lets both just ditch our countries for Japan! hmmm I don't know...I'll think about and if I think of anything I'll post it. __________________ I'm a Creationist because of personal spiritual experience and because of science. Want to discuss creation/evolution? Feel free to message me. A ship on a voyage could sink in the deep A ship in the shallow could crack on the reef Only ashore is it safe where it is built... But only ashore is it useless. -from Dream by GS Megaphone

04-07-2008, 08:01 PM	#20 (permalink)
DemonGod Koi's Bunny Join Date: Dec 2007 Location: In my dreams, together with her Age: 17 Posts: 3,722 Rep Power: 1243	Go Japan! Anime on TV! Anime stores! earning money with cosplay to buy anime! i'll wait for your answer while thinking myself __________________ Thanks a bunch asura :D thanks sano ^^ What could be under this spoiler..? Spoiler omg! O: didn't expect that! My claimed characters ^^ Spoiler Some of the things I've written: http://www.animea.net/forums/f50/som...w-s-emo-17252/ Place comments for those things here: http://www.animea.net/forums/f51/som...critics-17253/ AnimeA's family tree (if something's wrong pm me) http://i265.photobucket.com/albums/i...m/stamboom.jpg It looks so much better now =D My personality tests (7 and probably still more to come o.o) Spoiler "You're black! Your deep and mysterious, the perfect mix!" "Blue You are calm and controlled. You are also very sweet and get along with others well. Sometimes others do not understand why you are so nice and think you have a hidden agenda. If you do...thats to bad, but if you don't you have nothing to worry about! =]" Which Final Fantasy Character Are You? twilight test: "You are Edward! You are extremely good-looking and loving with excellent taste in music. Apparently your hobbies include music, fastness, and Bella. ^.~" seems she was right about me >.> but i would replace the Bella hobby with Rachy ;) o.o vampire test: You're a vampire bat. Aww... who's the cutest-wutest vampire in the world? You are! Normal vampires tend to be cranky and mean, but you're a sweet, sensitive little thing. You don't want to live in a drafty old castle; you'd rather hang out somewhere tropical with all of your friends. When you get hungry, instead of biting big holes in someone's neck, you make two teeny holes in their finger and lap up the blood with your tongue. If you could just shake that unfortunate habit of feeding on people while they're sleeping, you'd probably be the most popular pet on the planet -- you're fuzzy, you fit in a handbag, and you fly! Other signatures by de-kun, tama-san and asura: Spoiler How to not open a door XD Spoiler My Deviant :3 http://demon-god.deviantart.com/ She's mine and mine only ^^ Spoiler My hot foxy ^^ My little minions :3 Spoiler please feed them and help them evolve ^^ Adopted from Valenth Visit the Official AnimeA IRC Channel ^^

Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Email this Page
Display Modes
Linear Mode Switch to Hybrid Mode Switch to Threaded Mode

Similar Threads
Thread	Thread Starter	Forum	Replies	Last Post
Some of the things i write (i know it's emo)	DemonGod	Fan Fictions	71	06-27-2009 12:58 AM
"Me" fanfic comments & critics	biganimefan	Comments & critics	0	02-07-2008 04:54 PM